#dbw broken series

[dannyboy-writes]

Broken - Part IV

The plan was an easy one. Get in, release the hostages, get the files, get out.

“Would it kill them to pay for some light,” you said in a hushed voice. “I mean really, how are we supposed to see what we’re infiltrating.”

Natasha chuckled. “Stay on comms, y/n. In and out.”

“Sure thing, Red. In and out.” You repeated, taking the hall to the left.

You were in charge of the hostages while Natasha was supposed to get the files.

The halls were dark and endless, that combined with the plain white paint that covered each one of them made for a dangerous, nauseating combination.

Taking a turn to the right and checking behind your back, as Natasha spoke into your comms.

“Everything good your way?”

“Affirmative. Yours?”

“All good. I’m getting to the computer’s room.”

You replied ‘good’ and got to finding the hostages.

The first four rooms were dead ends, and you were starting to regret not asking for that five-person brigade. But stealth was important, and too many people meant too many problems.

After a lot of huffing and cursing under your breath you finally found the hostages.

Upon releasing them and explaining the situation as fast as possible you were all on the move.

“Found them, going your way now,” you said into your comms, not even waiting for an answer as Natasha nodded to herself. She was almost done with the data, you were almost done with the hostage situation.

This mission couldn’t have gone better.

Turning around a corner you saw two guards posted; they weren’t on the plan.

That door was guardless. It had to be. You’d studied the layout of the mission, very thoroughly.

You turned to the woman who seemed to be better qualified to handle a set of civilians through the base, “Look, I’m going to go face those two jokes over there. I need you to meet my partner at the entrance. She’ll be waiting for you.”

The woman listened carefully as you told her the way she would have to take.

“Go quietly but fast. If someone sees you just start running. Stay together, okay?”

She nodded, thanking you for everything.

You gave them a head start and told them to get moving.

Opening the comms you told Natasha, “Looks like we have a situation.”

“What did you break?”

“Oh nothing… yet. Look, I sent the hostages your way, I’m going to face two guards.”

“Why? Do they have anything?” She asked.

“I don’t know yet. But that door wasn’t supposed to be guarded, something’s up. I’m going to check what it is,” you explained.

She didn’t like this. “Y/n I don’t think we have time for checking every room in the base.”

“Don’t worry, Romanoff. I’ll be back before you say my name. See you, Red.”

“Be careful, y/n.”

Turns out in that not-supposed-to-be-guarded door, there were more than two guards.

There were more around twenty.

-

Natasha finished with the data and made her way to the entrance without complications. You facing some guards had been a detour from the mission, but she was confident you’d come back shortly.

She found Tamara, who appeared to be the person in charge of the group, and took them to the quinjet, where she stayed waiting for your queue to leave.

It didn’t come, and she started to feel her blood boiling. The uneasiness taking over her.

“Agent L/n, come in. Over.”

Nothing.

“Agent l/n, I repeat. Come in.”

Complete silence.

“Romanoff,” you grunted through her comms. “----- for a while.”

She grabbed her gun, seeing as you were struggling.

“Look, Na--- Fuck off, dipshit--”

And the line shut off.

Natasha didn’t know what to do.

Well, she did know, she just didn’t want to do it.

Standard procedure when having hostages is to leave immediately, and go back if needed after the hostages are secure.

She didn’t want to- she couldn’t leave you behind.

But she did, promising to the shut off comm that she would return for you.

[hviral]

Forecasters fear 5G wireless technology will muck up weather predictions

A remarkable interagency battle is playing out within the U.S. government over whether plans for the next generation of wireless technology, known as 5G, will threaten accurate weather forecasts—and, if so, how to mitigate the threat. Months of technical studies and debate have only deepened the impasse.

NASA and the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) say 5G antennas will blast signals near the frequencies their satellites use to gather critical water vapor data, and could compromise forecasts and science. The agencies are calling for tight limits on the signal strength. The Federal Communications Commission (FCC), which licenses the wireless spectrum for 5G operators in the United States, says those fears are overblown.

Jordan Gerth, a meteorologist at the University of Wisconsin in Madison, says 5G poses “a clear threat” to weather forecasting, but adds that “the devil is in the details.” Attempts to reach a compromise have faltered, and a July workshop organized by the National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine to search for a solution was canceled when federal agencies declined to attend. A series of international meetings beginning next week aims to hammer out global 5G regulations—but forecasters fear U.S. delegates will not argue for strict limits.

5G promises data speeds up to 100 times faster than current 4G networks; it could pave the way for widespread adoption of cutting-edge technologies such as autonomous cars. Already, telecom companies have begun to attach suitcase-size 5G antennas to cellphone towers and rooftops in cities around the world.

The companies want to expand service into additional frequency bands such as one at 24 gigahertz (GHz)—a frequency much higher than those used by existing wireless networks—because they can pack more information into the signals, and because the atmosphere is transparent to signals in the band. But such frequency bands are useful only if companies can blast data at relatively high signal strengths. FCC has proposed allowing signals as strong as −20 decibel watts (dBW) in all bands auctioned off so far, including one between 24.25 and 25.25 GHz.

But a nearby frequency is critical for weather forecasters. At about 23.8 GHz, water vapor molecules emit a small amount of radiation—one of the best ways to remotely sense the atmospheric water content that fuels clouds and storms. Because air is transparent at those frequencies, sensors attached to NOAA’s Joint Polar Satellite System and the European Meteorological Operational satellites can collect data from all levels of the atmosphere, providing a crucial input not just for familiar 7-day weather forecasts, but also for predicting the strength of hurricanes and where they will make landfall. A long-term water vapor record can also help calibrate climate change models, adds Eric Allaix, a meteorologist at Météo-France in Toulouse who leads a World Meteorological Organization committee on radio frequency coordination.

Even though 5G transmissions will be separated from the water vapor band by a 250-megahertz (MHz) buffer, forecasters worry they will bleed into the band and swamp the faint natural emission. In March, just before FCC’s auction of 24-GHz band frequencies, Secretary of Commerce Wilbur Ross, who oversees NOAA, and NASA Administrator Jim Bridenstine sent a letter asking FCC to postpone the auction. FCC went ahead with it anyway, and both T-Mobile and AT&T bought parts of the band.

Things heated up from there. Neil Jacobs, NOAA’s acting administrator, testified to Congress in May that an internal study had found 5G-related interference could cost NOAA 77% of the water vapor data it collects at 23.8 GHz, and could degrade weather forecasts by up to 30%, to 1980 levels. “It’s a critical data set for us,” Jacobs said. Bridenstine has echoed Jacobs’s concerns, and the Navy also worries about deteriorating forecast quality.

NOAA misunderstands 5G technology, FCC Chairman Ajit Pai said in his own congressional testimony in June. 5G will use laserlike “beam-forming” technology, which will maximize data transmission rates and minimize stray signals, Pai said. And the 24-GHz band will probably be limited to dense urban areas with many mobile phone users, justifying companies’ investments in the transmitter networks.

But Gerth fears that even if focused in beams and corralled to cities, 5G signals could still cause problems. Weather satellites see many square kilometers at once, and interference in part of a pixel could ruin the entire pixel, he says. Moreover, interference in coastal cities such as New York City and Miami, Florida, could hamper oceanic observations crucial to hurricane prediction.

Since April, NOAA and NASA have refined their study of the effect of 5G on their forecasts, in response to critiques from FCC and the wireless industry. According to sources who have seen the latest versions of the study, the agencies reach the same conclusion: Signal strengths need to be limited to about −42 dBW to protect weather data. (Because dBW is a logarithmic unit, this represents a limit more than 100 times stricter than FCC’s.) “The studies appear to validate all the public claims from NASA and NOAA,” says a staff member of a House of Representatives committee who has reviewed them.

But NOAA has not released the studies publicly or submitted them to FCC—the result, suggest some congressional sources, of pressure from the White House, which has strongly backed 5G. “The chairman has said we’re happy to look at studies,” says Brian Hart, an FCC spokesperson in Washington, D.C. “No verifiable studies have been presented.” (Neither NASA nor NOAA would comment to Science.)

Even if technical experts cannot resolve their disputes, diplomats might. At a meeting hosted by the Inter-American Telecommunication Commission, which will take place next week in Ottawa, Western Hemisphere nations will try to come to a consensus on 5G limits. They will bring that number to the quadrennial World Radiocommunication Conference, which will start on 28 October in Sharm El-Sheikh, Egypt, in an effort to negotiate a global limit. The Department of State will lead the U.S. delegation, but has not yet announced its position.

Jacobs briefed congressional staff 2 weeks ago. According to sources, he reported that an interagency compromise-seeking process had broken down and hinted that the United States may advance a noise limit of −28 dBW in Ottawa. That is more stringent than the −20 dBW that FCC has pushed for, but Jacobs reportedly believes it is still potentially disastrous for weather forecasting.

Europe may provide a precautionary counterweight. The regional telecommunication organization representing European countries plans to propose a −42-dBW limit at the radiocommunication conference, says Allaix, who co-authored a 2018 study that supports such a limit. The World Meteorological Organization has taken an even harder line, calling for −55 dBW. U.S. atmospheric conditions are critical for European forecasts 2 to 3 days later, so it “is really a worldwide issue,” Allaix says. “Our satellites need to be protected everywhere around the world.”

Resolving the battle over the 24-GHz band won’t end the war. In December, FCC plans to auction off frequencies in the 37.6- to 38.6-GHz band, close to those used to measure rain and snow. And several other potential 5G bands sit near weather-critical frequencies. Gerth is especially worried about frequencies between 50 and 55 GHz, necessary for atmospheric temperature profiles. “It’s an issue that’s not going to go away,” he says.

The post Forecasters fear 5G wireless technology will muck up weather predictions appeared first on HviRAL.

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[dannyboy-writes]

Broken - Part II

When she startled up with bandages all over her stomach and a headache that would surely last days, you were there. Sleeping in the visitor's chair, with cuts and bruises decorating your face.

She didn’t seem to be in any danger and you seemed to be okay, so she drifted off to sleep again.

She was awakened by a nurse and, for some reason, she frowned upon not seeing you. She tried to find a clock or her watch to see the time but there was none.

You arrived some time later with a coffee in your hand and sat in the chair you had claimed yours, picking up a magazine.

“Morning,” you said.

“Hi.”

“Breakfast should come in a sec.” You finally looked up at her. “Do you want any?”

“I— How long was I out?” 

“Uhm, about two days maybe. You lost a lot of blood, plus the sedative. Don’t worry, the nurses said it was good that you were sleeping,” the look of surprise on her face made you clarify.

“Two days?” You nodded. “And you were here the whole time?”

“I- Uh… Yeah, I had some spare time, plus they said it was better to have a familiar face, and-”

“Y/n,” she stopped you. 

“Yeah…”

“Thank you.”

“Sure,” you smiled. “Will you want breakfast?”

She nodded so you went to call the nurse, not before helping her sit on the bed.

-

You visited every day, and when she was discharged you stopped her from hitting the gym just yet. She was going to tear the stitches.

She hated that you were stopping her from training, but a part of her was touched that you cared.

After a few long weeks of having to stop Natasha from hurting herself, she was finally all good to go, she invited you to a training session.

Which went as well as anyone could predict. 

Badly for you, that was.

Still, it was good training, and everything helped get in good shape.

At some point you two developed the tradition to go to the bar after missions. It was a small tradition, but it was something unchangeable in both your lives.

Even if the mission you were leaving for wasn’t with each other, you still went to have drinks afterwards. 

Usually the visits were filled with games and jokes, but this time was different. Natasha could see the tiredness in your face, even when you tried to hide it.

You started talking about missions and places you both had seen and slowly the taste and fun of the alcohol rubbed off. 

“Can I ask you something,” you said lowering your voice. 

She shifted in her spot, realising the change in your expression. “What.”

“If I die, on a mission or something… Would you tell my family.”

“I…”

“Look, they’ve already been lied to about my death. I don’t want them to believe it’s the same,” you sighed. “If I die, I want them to know.”

Natasha gulped. She wasn’t unfamiliar to death; it was something she had accepted long ago. Doing what she did, death was the least of her worries. 

“Of course,” she finally replied. 

“Thanks,” you said, changing your expression to a more light one. 

“Now is my turn to ask.”

“Sure, shoot.”

“Promise me you won’t die,” she said, taking a sip of beer.

You chuckled. “I’ll try my best, Red.”

She wasn’t entirely sure when you had started with the nickname, but she liked it nonetheless.

A few weeks after that night you went on a long mission, almost six months off base. A lot happened, but she heard none of it.

Complete radio silence.

[dannyboy-writes]

Broken - Part I

a/n: this series will have violence and death, also blood, so warning for that // also feedback is greatly appreciated :))

Being called to the office of the Director of SHIELD was unnerving enough, to add to the mix the fact that the Black Widow was there with you.

Agent Romanoff paced back and forth reading a file, clearly memorizing the words in it. You noted a frown, and she stopped her pacing and glanced at you.

She re-read the file and looked at you again, shaking her head in disbelief, causing the hairs in your neck to rise.

Director Fury opened the door and asked for her, who left without a second thought.

-

“Do they need to come?” She asked Fury while glancing through the glass wall.

You were tapping a familiar rhythm on your knees while you let your mind analyse the situation.

“They’re a good agent, you are going to need good agents,” he defended.

“I don’t need anyone, I can handle myself fine.”

“You can’t do everything yourself, Romanoff. They’re good people.” He opened the door, “Agent L/n. Come in please.”

You got to your feet and got into the office.

“I assume you know Agent Romanoff,” he asked.

“Yes, sir.”

“You’ll be joining her on a mission,” he waited for you to nod. He handed you a folder and said, “The files are here, anything else you may need, you talk about it with Romanoff. I expect nothing but professionalism, people.”

You assumed that last bit wasn’t entirely for you as he looked her way.

Nodding a ‘Yes, sir’, you grabbed the folder, glancing at Agent Romanoff who once again had her eyes glued to her file, and left the room to analyse it more thoroughly.

She got out of the office not long after you did.

“Read it. Tonight at 1900 we’ll have a briefing. Don’t be late,” she ordered.

“Won’t be, ma’am.” You said, and with that she left.

-

Apparently SHIELD had finally put a name on the culprit of the recent agents’ deaths, and your eyes widened at the information.

CODE NAME: WINTER SOLDIER IDENTITY: UNKNOWN ACTIVE SINCE: UNKNOWN

It was impossible, though. He was a myth. Right?

You checked on the time and realized you had less than half an hour to the briefing, so you had a quick shower after hours of reading and re-reading the folder.

Natasha had memorized the file and packed, ready to leave as soon as there was a plan. You… You had your doubts.

It was a dangerous mission, taking into account that everyone the Winter Soldier encountered ended up dead. And you still didn’t know anything about him.

“Did you read it,” Agent Romanoff asked.

She almost sounded ready to reprehend you. As if you wouldn’t read the file before jumping on a mission.

“Yes, ma’am. I have a question.”

“Just- Agent Romanoff will do. What question?”

“Wasn’t the Winter Soldier a myth? Like a scapegoat for everything going on in the 50’s…” You asked.

“If only. It would make the job easier,” she admitted. “Everything clear with the plan?”

“Yes.”

“Good. We leave tomorrow, then.”

“I’ll go pack then. Good night Agent Romanoff.”

And with that you excused yourself and left.

-

Finding him wasn’t easy. There was a location in the files, but it was a building, not really a small place to check.

After the first three floors, you and Agent Romanoff decided it was better to split. Make it faster.

She found him.

She called through the comms, “Agent L/n, meet me at the 5b.”

You checked your gun’s magazine and made your way to the fifth floor, finding her struggling against the Soldier.

He was taller than her for a few heads, but she still managed to hold her ground.

You took his punch to her face as a queue to intervene.

He was trying to leave when you tackled him to the floor, albeit it wasn’t the best way to attack a Super Soldier, but you were in a rush.

You looked to your side and saw Agent Romanoff getting up and ready to join you in the attack.

A hard hit from his metal arm to your jaw was more than enough to knock you out for some time, and when you came to your senses he was fighting Romanoff.

A loud gunshot later she fell to the floor.

You made your way to her, stumbling on the furniture, as the Winter Soldier left.

“Stay with me Romanoff, focus on my voice,” you told her, pressing your hand to her bleeding stomach.

She gasped as you did so and held onto your arm.

“Sorry,” you muttered.

You put her arm around your shoulder and tried to ignore the obnoxious ringing in your ears as you led the both of you out of the room.

“Just a bit more, come on Romanoff,” you groaned as she started to feel heavier.

She was dozing off, she’d lost a lot of blood.

“What’s 176 plus 293?” You asked in an attempt to have her attention.

“Really, L/n?”

“Come on, tell me.”

“It’s… 469.”

“Good, plus 537 minus 254.”

She groaned, “752. Stop it with the math.”

“Okay, I just want you to focus on something.”

“I hate math,” she stated.

“Alright I’m going to tell you a story then, just stay with me.”

She sighed a ‘sure’, and you started leading you two to the roof, hoping the chopper she’d called was there.

“You know how I was in the military,” you stopped for her nod. “Well, they moved me to an off-the-books program.”

Natasha took note of that. She was trying to retain all information possible, trying to stop her mind from wandering off.

“They told my family I’d died, and never told me. I only found out when I left. Fucked up, right.”

“Yes.”

“Good, just a bit more, come on. We’re getting to the roof, come on,” you encouraged her. “Tell me about you a bit.”

“I’m tired,” Natasha said.

You tightened your hold on her, feeling her almost fall off. “I know, just a bit more, come on.” You groaned as you shook the headache off of you.

You got to the chopper that took you both to the base and from there to medical.

As one of the doctors checked on you, you saw Agent Romanoff being led to a surgery room. You just hoped you’d helped in some way.

[dannyboy-writes]

Broken - Part III

“I assume you’ll want your usual partner, Romanoff,” Fury said.

“If they’re back, yes.”

“They are, Dr. Cho is checking on them.”

She frowned, “What happened.”

“Just a check up I assume. You’re welcome to join them, just give them the file,” he dismissed her.

It had been some time since your last mission together, and Natasha wasn’t fond of that. Of course, professional as she was taught to be, no one realised her disdain for partners other than you.

You just had that thing where you would understand everything she wanted to say without need for her to utter a single word.

It was perfect for missions, of course, but it was also perfect for her. She was never one to love talking about feelings.

-

You winced at the light in your eyes, “Not even a warning, doc.” You joked.

“I assumed you were familiar with the procedure,” she countered.

“I am but warnings are nice.”

She laughed at your remark, giving you a glass of water.

“Are they broken already?” Natasha asked with a familiar smirk.

“Only on the outside,” you groaned, getting up.

“The headache should go away in a few hours,” Dr. Cho said. “Try not to hit your head in the meantime.”

“Can’t make any promises,” you smiled. “What do we have?” You asked Nat.

“I’ll tell you on the way, I’m starving.”

She handed you your jacket and took you to your usual Café.

-

“So basically Hydra scum, that’s what we have,” you said, taking a sip of coffee, which was rather bitter. Strange.

She observed your nose scrunching up but didn’t mention anything. “Basically, yes.”

You sighed, “It would be nice if we got rid of Nazis already. I mean come on, it’s not 1940 anymore.”

She laughed and nodded, taking a bite of a croissant. “Well, that’s why we’re here.”

You nodded. “Well, I gotta go to the bathroom. Don’t eat my toasts,” you fakely ordered.

As you got up the floor started to spin, and you had to place a hand on the table to steady yourself.

“You good?” Natasha asked.

“Yeah, just got a bit dizzy that’s all.” And with that you left for the restroom.

You returned to the table and asked the waiter for some water.

“I think I’m leaving,” you said.

“We just got here.”

“No, I mean SHIELD. I’ve been thinking about it for some time, and I think this is it.”

“Oh… Why do you want to leave?”

Natasha had seen what the job did to you. You were too good for espionage.

“I wanna see the world. And not like we do here. I don’t want to stay at a shitty motel and wear caps and sunglasses every day. I wanna pay for a fancy hotel, and go do overpriced tours, see overrated places,” you explained. “Besides…”

“What?”

“I don’t wanna die on the job,” you said abruptly. “I want to spend time with my family, with my friends. I want to live outside being an agent.”

“I think it’s a good idea, y/n,” Natasha said. “But I can’t lie and say that I won’t miss you.”

“Come on, Red. Don’t go getting all blue on me. We’ll still see each other. You won’t get rid of me that easily,” you chuckled, breaking the tension.

“I know, moron. I’m going to miss my partner. The rookies suck. I almost died on my last mission, all ‘cause you were stuck on desk duty,” she joked.

“You have to give them time, not everyone is quick to get things. You’ll see, you’ll replace me in no time.”

“Don’t think so, but as you say,” she sipped her coffee. “So when are you going to tell Fury?”

“Well, I’ve had a resignation letter written for some time now. I think I’m going to give it to him after this mission, but I talked about it with him a few weeks back,” you blinked a tear out of your eye.

You wanted to leave; but it was a hard decision, still. SHIELD had been a big part of your life.

“This is the last one,” you told Natasha. “I asked him for the last one to be with you. I’m going out with a bang,” you laughed.

“You seem like you’ve thought this through.”

“Yeah…”

“Where will you go first,” she asked.

You left the Café hours later, after discussing the Mission, and everything that would come after.

[dannyboy-writes]

Broken - Part VI

When they arrived on base the team of doctors that Maria had asked for took you off her hands, and immediately sent you to an OR.

“Do you need anything?” Maria asked. “Do you want to hit something?”

Natasha shook her head. “No.”

“Do you want me to do anything?”

“No, thank you. I just- I need some space,” she said, looking at her blood soaked hands.

Maria nodded and patted her back, leaving to file the paperwork and to interview the hostages again.

Natasha was hypnotized by your blood all over her. Frozen in her spot, replaying everything you ever said to her.

I’ll be back before you say my name.

Now she wished she had cut you off and made you leave immediately.

Her mind blurred every sound it found as she made her way to the showers. The floor started to spin under her and she had to hold onto a nearby wall to not collapse.

Once in the showers she got rid of her blood-drenched clothes and turned on the hot water until it burned her skin, trying to feel something other than helpless.

She scrubbed her hands so hard that her skin turned red. But at least she didn’t have your blood on her anymore.

You’ll see, you’ll replace me in no time.

Her tears became enraged sobs as she thought of that conversation.

If she could go back she would’ve told you to quit right there. No last bang. No last nothing. She would’ve dragged you out of SHIELD and given that letter to Fury herself.

After crying all the water within her she left the showers and went to the med bay, hoping you were already out of the OR.

-

When she got there, she saw you hooked to machines and wires. Bandages all over you.

She pulled a chair to your side and played with your bracelet; her mind wandering to the darkest of places.

She saw Doctor Cho approach her and loosened her grip on your wrist, shifting it to her own hands.

“Their injuries are extensive,” Dr. Cho explained as Natasha now fiddled with her fingers. “There is no way of telling when they’ll wake up.” She paused.

“What,” Natasha inquired.

Part of her knew the rest of that sentence, but she hated the thought of it.

“There’s no way of knowing if Y/n will wake up. They’ve had several traumatisms to their head, the damage is too large,” Dr. Cho raised her hand to her nose and sighed. “I should’ve insisted on that desk job.”

Natasha blinked in surprise. You hadn’t mentioned any desk job.

“What desk job?”

“They didn’t tell you? I assumed they would’ve. I’m sorry.”

“Tell me what, Hellen?”

“The last time they were on desk duty, I put them there. They’d just returned from a mission with all but a broken skull,” she paused to see how Natasha was dealing with the information. “I told them about the TBI, but they insisted on continuing their work. One last mission they said.”

“TBI…” Natasha searched her mind for the syllables.

“Traumatic Brain Injury,” Dr. Cho clarified.

Everything clicked in Natasha’s brain.

The holidays, the dizziness, all the months stuck on paperwork. Even the bitter coffee.

Why hadn’t you said anything?

You should’ve said something.

One last mission.

So this had been happening for some time already. She replayed every conversation with you to try to find that first moment, but she found nothing. Only memories that left her breathless.

At some point Dr. Cho was called about another patient and left Natasha with you. But she didn’t notice, too lost in her thoughts.

She only realized moments later, when the light the woman was covering hit her in the face, breaking her off of her daydreams.

-

She visited every day, even asked Fury to put a hold on her missions or, if need be, that they were near the base.

The man had asked her if she wanted time off, but she declined. Working kept her busy, and she didn’t like where her mind went when she wasn’t busy.

She went to your parents house, who understood instantly.

Your mum broke into your father’s chest, who just held her close. He was still standing but his eyes were empty now.

After that day they moved you to another hospital, one where your parents could go visit at any time without having to face all that red tape.

Natasha found a letter in your apartment. Sealed and with nothing but her name in the envelope. And after many tears she found one for your parents as well.

After a long two months of visiting you, of endless hoping, your parents told her the news. Heavy news.

They were letting you go.

Her heart shattered in a million tiny pieces, tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

“It’s what they wanted, we are very sorry, miss Romanoff,” your father said.

Apparently the letter you’d written for them had a will attached to it.

It took all of Natasha to not cry in front of them and she gulped before asking, “When is it happening?”

-

She stood in your grave for almost two hours after the ceremony, with the sky getting darker by the minute.

Warm tears rolled down her cheeks, as she knelt by the stone, muttering promises and goodbyes.

She headed to the bar after collecting herself and sat in your usual booth.

It felt too empty.

She waited for her drink and gave an empty toast.

It was tradition but now that you weren’t there it felt wrong.

You were gone, and she was broken.

[dannyboy-writes]

Broken - Part V

Another hit, that’s what you woke up to. A hard hit on your nose.

It must’ve busted because all you could smell now was blood.

Something cold and slick decorated your forehead and you could sense the heat leaving your body with every second. Your hands tied behind your back, straining on your shoulders.

It all happened so fast.

One second you were facing two morons and the next a loud hit to your head knocked you out.

The man in front of you was surely asking questions but all you could hear was ringing. Everything else was blurred.

That couldn’t be good.

Dr. Cho had mentioned you shouldn’t hit your head, you assumed now that it was because of this.

Your vision was clouded with big dark spots and your focus drifted from bad to worse.

That couldn’t be good either.

The man didn’t seem to like your lack of answer because he hit you once again. Or maybe he just liked hitting people in chains, you didn’t care to think about it too much.

Thinking hurt.

Everything hurt.

-

Natasha dropped the hostages as fast as she could and left again, only stopping to reload her weapons and to ask Hill to go with her. She was going to need help if you were injured.

The flight back to Hydra’s base was too slow, everything was too slow. She had to be faster.

She shouldn’t have let you part from the plan.

Idiot.

She should’ve seen it coming. She should’ve acted.

Truth was that even if she had been right there with you she still couldn’t have stopped you from leaving.

Too stubborn.

“Come on, come on. Agent L/n, come in,” she spoke into her comms in an attempt to get anything other than radio silence.

Complete silence.

Her comms were never silent when you were on the other side.

Telling Maria to stay on the quinjet, in case anything happened, she got to the base and searched every floor, every hall.

She found nothing.

She remembered what you had said,

That door wasn’t supposed to be guarded, something’s up.

Where was that door?

Come on Natasha, think.

She found in her mind the layout of the mission, every guarded door, every lonely hall. There it was.

She made her way to the door and found blood. Too much blood.

Leaving the base she took a closer look at its surroundings. There had to be somewhere they would take you. A warehouse, anything.

She saw one nearby and made her way to it, hoping you’d be there. Hoping you’d be fine.

There was no one there. Not a good sign.

It was either empty or… No, you were going to be fine.

She searched the whole place and found you, back against the door, tied to a chair.

Natasha didn’t like the way your head hung into your chest. She also didn’t like the blood decorating the floor.

Taking careful steps towards you she realised there was nobody to embush her, so she dropped her guard and ran to you.

She loosened the ties in your wrists and took a look at you.

You were out of it. Layers of blood painted your face, from dark dried ones to the most fresh one, still sticky.

She noticed the busted nose and bleeding lip, the black eye and the slash in your forehead, probably from the back of a gun.

There was blood leaking from your shirt and stomach.

Shit.

“Hill, ready the quinjet. I have Y/n,” she commanded in her comms.

“On it, how are they looking?”

“Not good,” she muttered, trying to carry you to the warehouse’s entrance. She tried to do it faster, but stopped her rush when she almost lost her grip on you.

Maria brought the quinjet as close to the warehouse as she could, and waited for Natasha to come out.

And when she did, oh boy.

You were pale as snow in the outside light, the only color in you was dark red. Your limbs were hanging dead in Natasha’s arms.

Maria went to help her and they slowly put you inside the quinjet. After you were secure in one place Maria got to flying, asking for a team of doctors to be ready.

Natasha just sat there, holding your hand, whispering - more to herself - that you were going to be okay.